You’re influencing decisions, managing stakeholders, and driving execution without formal authority. If you can’t earn respect through competence and clarity, you’re useless.

I’ve spent years working alongside my exec, Fanvue’s Founder and CEO, and the proximity to decision-making at that level has been a masterclass in what separates good leaders from great ones. Great leaders don’t hoard information or control. They build systems that scale, trust their people to own outcomes, and create clarity where there’s chaos. My job has been to operate as an extension of that leadership – not as a gatekeeper, but as someone who makes the entire operation more effective.

One of the biggest lessons has been the difference between being busy and being effective. Early on, I thought success meant being across everything, responding instantly, and never saying no. That’s a trap. Real leadership is about prioritisation. It’s knowing when to step in and when to delegate, when to execute exactly as instructed and when to challenge the approach entirely. It’s about making sure the right problems get solved, not just the loudest ones.

I’ve also learned that influence is earned through preparation, not presence. Anyone can have an opinion in a meeting. But if you walk in with options, implications, and a recommendation backed by research, people listen. I’ve sat in rooms with investors, department heads, and senior leadership where my voice carried weight not because of my job title, but because I’d done the work and could articulate the path forward with confidence.

The EA role has also taught me how much leadership depends on adaptability. I’ve led a $22M Series A fundraise, built operational systems from scratch, managed office relocations, and handled investor relations – all while keeping my exec’s day-to-day running smoothly. That breadth of exposure accelerates your learning in a way most traditional leadership tracks don’t. You’re not siloed. You’re seeing the full picture and understanding how every function connects.

But perhaps the most important lesson has been about service leadership. There’s a misconception that being in a support role means you’re subordinate, that you’re less strategic or less capable. That’s rubbish. The best leaders I’ve seen – and the best EAs – operate from a place of service. It’s not about ego. It’s about making the people around you better, removing blockers, and creating the conditions for success. That’s what leadership actually is.

As I ramp up my career and gun for future Chief of Staff roles, everything I’ve built as an EA has prepared me for that. I’ve learned to lead without a title, influence without authority, and execute with precision under pressure. Those skills don’t care about gender or job title. They’re what make someone effective at the highest levels of an organisation. And that’s what being a male EA has taught me about leadership: it’s not where you sit in the org chart. It’s what you deliver and how you make others better in the process.